Some people think my life becomes harder because of someone. Beer apparently only has 7 calories.
You began to let your darkest moments of your past fill your thoughts and swallow you whole. You knew you had a choice whether to fight them or give in to them, but you decided the latter. You let them consume you until the very last part of you left that was made up of love, hope and trust were completely engulfed into a black abyss. From then on, you were constantly afraid of what the future holds; you were afraid of change; you were afraid of people – afraid that they might get close to you and find out something about you only to use them against you; afraid that you will let jealousy overtake you and end up hating anyone you deemed better than yourself. You kept living like this until every piece of your soul was shredded off from your body only to exist as a soulless entity roaming the face of the Earth.
It took me awhile to get used to the fact that I can never have you back again and that I am now only left with the memories of our countless adventures residing at the deepest part of my brain. I cherish the good times and the bad, although there were times when I felt completely shut out and alone just because I wanted to know what was wrong with you. I have moved on and despite everything –
I am happy to have had the chance to witness you before everything shattered.
I am happy to have been able to call you my friend.
Something my lecturer said today piqued an interest in me. As a dental student, what with all the practical sessions and endless lectures, it’s hard to actually find inspiration to write (thus, the reason of my absence). Even if I do come across a thought or a story that arouses my senses and urge to write about it, it never made it through. The hectic schedule usually gets the best of everything. I have come to embrace the fact that time is truly precious (as is sleep) and i should never take advantage of any free time that rarely comes my way.
Just last Saturday, our faculty held the very first interview session for the next intake. Before this, we never had to go through interviews as a requirement unlike some universities. Normally, we were all handpicked by our Dean based on our academic and extracurricular achievements (and a little bit of luck, I might add). So naturally, the interview session was the talk of the faculty. Everyone (lecturers and staffs) were talking about it and giving personal opinions. My lecturer today was one of them.
He commented how most of the interviewee were not prepared at all. He said that most of them did not even bother to research the course they are planning to pursue. A few even actually thought that all we do in dentistry were tooth extractions! However, I personally feel that we can’t blame them for lacking the knowledge of what they’re about to go through if they pursue the course. There aren’t enough blogs or sites out there that outlines the whole course and give useful advises for anyone that wants to make it in this field. Some people weren’t born with doctors or dentists around them that might let them in on a thing or two about dentistry. I know the struggle because dentistry is a course limited to only a certain amount of students per university. With the fast-paced schedule, it’s not a surprise that not many ever wrote about the life in dentistry.
Today’s technology makes the creation of a photograph a trivial thing. With the rapid improvement of cameras within mobile devices in the last decade, we are rarely without the ability to take photographs of the minutiae of our daily lives. We can share images with others with the tap of a button, and the feedback in the form of likes and comments is addictive. With the trivialization of photography in an age of selfies, latte art, sunsets, and vintage color filters (all of which I love, if I’m being honest), some of the heart and art of the craft seems to be getting lost. As a photographer, do you take the time to identify and understand what really excites you when you find it in front of your lens? If not, do you wish to start?
“You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have.” —…
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Writers don’t like being told what to do. That’s part of what makes us writers. We like to write about what we want to write about, and if somebody tells us what to write about, a lot of us will struggle.
Just like most people, I don’t like being told what to do, but I also don’t like telling others what to do. This puts me in a bad position. If I don’t like being told what to do and I don’t like telling others what to do, then I’m in a social no-man’s land. Maybe that’s why I like being a writer; I have complete control without really having to make decisions for anybody else.
I don’t like being told what to read either. As a reader, I constantly see…
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There used to be two flowers that grew under a big oak tree just across the open field that stretched from my little cottage. These two flowers were of the rarest kinds. They grew flower petals that were the colour of the sunset – yellow, purple, pink, orange – all blended into a colour of hope, wonder and ecstacy. They were so magnificent that you can spot them straight from the windows of my cottage. They were the two beauties of the valley. They existed as one.
On the Friday of the third week of November, I noticed something different. I didn’t know how long it has been that another flower grew between the two beauties. From far away, that flower was as striking as the two but the colour of the petals were different – they were a mixture of red, blue and a tint of purple here and there. The mixture summed up essences of bold, strong and mysterious all into one.
I was so used to gazing upon the two flowers that now, with a third one sprouting out of nowhere let alone being in between the two, the view was odd. The combination of colours of the three flowers were somehow not in balance. A number of days had passed when one day, I decided to walk across the field towards the big oak tree. Upon reaching, I noticed the most peculiar thing.
One of the beauties and the bold one had produced a new offspring just next to them. It was exquisite. It grew into a colour of rainbow – fun, quirky and lively. It was such a lovely view to witness at that time that I had completely forgotten about the other flower. When I turned my head, I saw it. The other flower had wilted. Its once before colours were drained out from the petals and it has lost every ounce of life in it.
It was gone.
The thing is, it didn’t fit into the picture anymore. It’s existence was overcast by the shadows of the bold one. It no longer belonged and it never will. It will never be the same again because time has changed everything. They will never exist as one anymore.
Thing is, you can’t change what time does on you whether you like it or not. But what you can do is to adapt. You may not be one person’s priority anymore and you may not be able to be as close anymore but that’s okay. You can adapt. We’re humans. It’s in our nature.
so long since my last post. I’ve been dying to update my blog but I was just too busy. I just started my first degree not too long ago (September) and ever since, life has been throwing lemons at me from every angle. Dentistry is one really tough course where classes start at 8am and finishes at 6pm everyday with lunch breaks in between which only last for about 45 minutes. We have seven subjects, minus the compulsory subjects by the university with which I think are not even the slightest bit important, covered for dentistry. Anatomy, physiology, biochemistry, microbiology, pathology, pharmacology and oral biology. These subjects are to be taught to us until the second year of our course. The biggest challenge actually is the limited time for us to study everything. Every chapter for every subject is taught for every hour – one whole chapter per hour, everyday. Don’t matter how short that chapter is or how freaking long it is, you still need to complete the whole thing in an hour. Then by the time you come home, you have dinner, do the laundry, do some assignments, you’ll already be dead tired. You want to revise but then you’re only able to revise for ONE subject – or half at least. Saturdays and Sundays are supposed to be for chilling out and to catch up on subjects that weren’t revised, right? Wrong. Apparently, Saturdays are occupied for co-curriculum activities every week and Sundays are sometimes occupied for extra activities held by either the faculty or the university itself.
However, despite having such a hectic schedule when it only has been two months when I first started, I kinda enjoy it. I mean, I do get stressed out and start ranting and all but then I’m really passionate about what I’m taking. Dentistry has been my first choice since, well, not too long ago – it was when I first got my braces… last year. I remember being so clueless about what I wanted to pursue. Mom and dad were both telling me to go for Pharmacy which I simply complied because all I was thinking about was to complete my foundation in science and take up any degree to start a living. I knew I didn’t like pharmacy but I didn’t know what else to do. Then one day, I went to get my braces done. As the dentist was trying to put the braces on me, it hit me right then and there that, I want to be a dentist. Passion is the only thing that’s keeping me going. Of course this doesn’t only apply to me but to everyone out there. When you have the passion for something, you’re able to do anything. Passion, sheer hard work, creativity, confidence and a little bit of luck.
Carrie spoke through narrow lips that looked like they were sewn on too tightly. She had the gravelly voice of a lifetime smoker, but her trembly tone and hesitant nature made her barely audible. She seldom talked to people during the support group, and if she did she never peered directly into anyone’s eyes. She usually sat near a corner of the room, always making sure to face the only door leading in or out.
Carrie was petite and jittery. The pale foundation she slathered on her cheeks and the thick black lines she drew under her eyes did not conceal her frailty. Her dry, bleached-blonde hair tapered sharply just below her shoulders. It hung in solid-looking clumps that, like the rest of her, seemed as brittle as icicles.
Carrie usually dressed in snug, almost colorless acid-washed jeans and plain, baggy, crew neck sweatshirts in creamy tones of pastel pink or yellow. In all those faint colors, she sometimes appeared as…
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Hitting 20 in a couple of months. The beginning of “The Asshole Years”